My Mom used to fart out miracles.
I think about this a lot.
It didn’t matter what the experience was, or even the lack of extravagance we had growing up, being one of five kids in the house. When I reflect on my own childhood, this is how I remember the magic my Mom created for me. Now as a Mom myself, I realize it’s not as easy as she made it seem.
As moms, we’re constantly faced with the feeling that we should be doing more. More for our kids, more for our families, more for ourselves. Whether it’s organizing a birthday party, making sure our children are excelling in school, or ensuring they’re involved in extracurricular activities, it seems like there’s always something else you could be doing. The pressure to keep up with what everyone else is doing—whether it’s other moms in the neighborhood or influencers on social media—makes it hard to ever feel like you’ve done enough.
It’s almost as if motherhood has turned into a race to see who can do the most. You feel this internal drive to give your kids everything, to be the perfect mom who provides endless experiences, toys, and opportunities, even though you already know they have more than enough. The fear of missing out, of falling short, or of somehow letting your kids down looms large. Even when you know, deep down, that your kids are happy and healthy, you still feel like you need to do more to give them the best.
And then the holidays come around, and that feeling intensifies.
Suddenly, it’s not just about everyday parenting—it’s about creating magical memories, buying the perfect gifts, and orchestrating experiences that your kids will remember forever. The pressure to make the holiday season extraordinary amplifies that already constant desire to give more.
The holidays are supposed to be about joy and family, but instead, they often become a source of stress and comparison, making you feel like you’re always one step behind in creating the perfect experience for your kids.
But the truth is, your kids don’t need more. They don’t need the latest gadgets, more activities, or bigger parties. What they need most is you—your presence, your joy, and your love. Yet in the whirlwind of holiday preparations and social pressures, we often forget that.
As a Mom and therapist, I’ve felt this same pressure to do more, and I feel it all the time.
But I’ve learned to ask myself an important question: More of what? Is it more gifts, more activities, or is it simply more moments of connection and peace? Because at the end of the day, stuff doesn’t make our family happier—it creates clutter, chaos, and in actuality, causes me more stress.
Here’s what I’ve discovered, and what I share with my clients when they feel overwhelmed by the pressures of doing more in modern motherhood:
1. You Are Wired To Want To Give Your Kids More: As a Mom you are constantly planning, preparing and doing your best to micromanage the emotional responses of your kids. You innately have the desire to give your children everything. There is so much power in recognizing this and giving yourself permission to just be instead of being everything you think you need to be. At the end of the day, your children don’t need more stuff, they need a happy and calm Mom.
2. Your Children Won’t Know: Your kids will love everything they receive. That is literally the magic of motherhood. They won’t care about how much you spend or even realize that you wanted to get them 10 presents but only got them 6. Your children are stuck in the moment, something you could learn a lot from enjoying as well.
3. Presence matters more than presents.When your kids grow up, the memories they cherish won’t be about the stuff they had but about the time spent together. Do you want them to look back and remember a mom who was always stressed and overwhelmed, or one who laughed, played, and enjoyed the holiday season with them?
The pressure to create the “perfect” family is everywhere, and the holidays just make it worse. The most powerful question you can ask yourself is: What does that even mean?
Your version of perfection doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Setting realistic expectations, focusing on what truly matters, and embracing the beauty of “enough” can transform your parenting, and the holidays into something far more meaningful.
If the weight of parenting expectations feels like too much, you’re not alone. The pressure of being a modern mom is real, especially during this time of year. Take a step back and give yourself permission to rest. And if you need support, I’m here to help.
Schedule a FREE CONSULTATION to get the guidance you need to navigate the holiday season with more peace and less pressure. You deserve to enjoy this time with your family—without the stress. Schedule Your Complimentary Call HERE
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